What is Wrong with me | What is wrong with us?

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As I celebrate my birthday this coming week, I am wondering, what is wrong with me?

For the past 10 to 15 years I have looked at myself in the mirror, sometimes for what felt like 5 minutes, and sometimes 2.

But then I realized there is something wrong with me, the time I took looking in the mirror became less and less until when it could take me just about one second or so. That's when I realized what was wrong with me. I realized that be it five minutes or a second that I spent in the mirror, I always went there for one thing: my imperfections.

Now, 90% of my face is clear, and by clear I mean pimple-free. But I realized every time I went before the mirror, I only focused my attention on the one or two pimples and black spots on my face. In spite of the fact that I visited the mirror every single day, I couldn't remember the last time I had looked at my entire face.

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I realized that indeed something is wrong with us! It's like we are on a mission to criticize ourselves, to remind ourselves only of the things we have failed at, the things we can't do, and forgetting the other 90-or-so things that we can do and are good at.

For example, you might find that when someone compliments you on how good you look in a particular outfit, your response is like, "No, really? Are you serious?" Come on, you know you look good, that's why you bought that outfit in the first place!

That incident in the mirror reminded me of my life: I am so sad, struggling, having a bad attitude, and dragging myself to and fro everyplace I go because of these two areas am struggling with. After that incident in the mirror, for the first time in a long time I realized that I have such a great life, I noticed that my life is made up of 100 different areas, and am struggling with only two. 

I know a million people would give up anything to get the health that you currently have, but you don't know how amazing your life is just because you have failed to get a job, you have lost sight of what a great husband you have because you are struggling to convince, just name any area you might be struggling with.

I don't know what it is that is wrong with us, but I know for sure that it's a thief of joy, a robber of fulfillment, and a thief of life itself.

Whatever is wrong with us was not wrong with apostle Paul, because he was in prison and he sang hymns as if he didn't see his terrible state of housing or feeding. Out of all the thousands of words that the apostle Paul wrote, I only remember him mentioning his troubles only twice. He mentions he's sleeping in the cold and being flogged so as to encourage the church and not to complain 2 Corinthians 11:27-29, and another time he mentions a thorn in his flesh as he is telling us about the sufficiency of God's grace (2 Corinthians 12:7-9).

If at anytime the apostle Paul paid that much attention to everything that was wrong with his life, I believe he wouldn't have done even half the ministry he did. Like I mentioned before, whatever is wrong with us is a thief of life itself, as we usually see people giving up the awesome 90% of their lives to run after the 10%, because this thing makes us think that what we are struggling with is what life is all about, that when we get it, all will be well.

I write this as a reminder to myself,  to have a complete 360-degree view of my life.  To remind myself that it is not fair for me to feel frustrated with life just because I haven't yet landed my ideal job yet I am in perfect health, with a loving family, amazing friends, progressing ministry, good education, awesome talents, and a supreme God.

As I live out this my new age, please remind me that paying great attention to your struggles is a thief of joy, purpose, and life itself.

Amazing Wednesday.

please have an amazing week.

Until next Wednesday.

God bless you.